About YouTube Red | What I Know & What I Think

About YouTube Red | What I Know & What I Think

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, I realised ten days ago (precisely) that YouTube Red was a thing ??? But at the time, we didn't really know what was going on, so I decided not to write at the moment, to avoid being wrong, having the wrong information, or listening to all these rumors that wanted to make the thing worse that it actually is.

But for now, here is what we know :

1. You pay 10 dollars a month for no ads, watching videos offline, and to have special contents (included some big YouTubers doing their thing like online shows and stuff like that).
2. You HAVE TO agree with the YouTube Red system, or ALL your videos will be privated until you agree. (So, if you REALLY love these old videos made by an inactive account, you should probably find a way to save them. I won't tell you how, but it's just a warning.)
3. The money you give to YouTube Red is actually put into a large bucket for ALL YOUTUBERS (big or small, it doesn't matter) and gives the money back according to the viewings of ALL the YouTubers.

(Tell me if I've forgotten something here)

So, here's my thoughts on this :

1. If I were a YouTuber (which I'm not), I would refuse this. Why ? Because I'm not a money cow. I would hate depending on the money taken from people who can't afford the goddamn thing. If I want to make something cool, it's better to make everyone capable of watching it. I don't want to create a split between some people who can afford it and those who can't. About AdBlock ? Well, YouTubers should do a video to explain how bad it is to use it. (I don't use it anymore myself, thanks.)
2. Wow, you have to agree to keep making YouTube videos ? I guess that (this is what I'm afraid of and it will probably happen in the next couple of years) someday, YouTube will say, well, let's do like Vessel. Make everything paid-for content. Sorry, I thought the gest on YouTube was... Ah, yes. Broadcast yourself. Show your talent, for free, and SHARE WITH PEOPLE. Talk to your audience via the comments, make video-responses, have a conversation, have FUN, basically. None of that is happening anymore. Basically, Google has managed to transform what was the innovation of the century and sparked talents across the globe (and infested us with cat videos and « try not to laugh challenge » videos, and to be honest, I haven't laughed even ONCE, so I guess I'm pretty good at this game) into a capitalistic machine that is just here to make more money, and nothing else.
3. This system is UNFAIR, let me tell you why : one, because the biggest YouTubers already have the longest view time, so they would only have a bigger part of the cake, compared to small YouTubers. Basically, not only Youtube was promoting ONLY BIG CHANNELS and not the small ones via the frontpage and the search thingies, but also, now, the big channels are going to get bigger, and the small channels are going to die and be swallowed whole. Isn't that funny that even BEFORE YouTube Red was announced (coincidence, I just checked out : it was EXACTLY ON THAT DAY that I posted it and then I found out about YouTube Red while going on Twitter and going through the trending tags, wow I can predict the future), I made a video about having a regular audience ? Well it won't be enough, since ALL the revenue will go to the bigger channels. It doesn't matter if you watch them or not. It doesn't matter who you watch or not. The big will get bigger and the small will DIE.

To be honest, I thought about this, and I have a couple of advice for fans and small YouTubers who are afraid of seeing the true spirit of YouTube die :

1. To the fans : I've seen many YouTubers say that the majority of their revenus are made RIGHT NOW so PLEASE wait for a little while before going Red and start paying the thing (if you so wish). There was a rumour creators wouldn't get paid for the free trial month (for now they WILL be paid, but only thanks to the Google Music subscribers that are joining now, they'll recieve as much money as without Red), so I'd advise you wait for a little before starting paying Red.
2. Actually you know what ? It doesn't MATTER if you don't pay Red. I mean, the free YouTube is still available anyways ? And for me (in France), Red hasn't arrived yet, so I guess we'll see the effects in the rest of the world later. But don't worry ! If you don't pay, you'll still be able to watch your favourite YouTubers. Just turn off AdBlock, please. This way, you give money to the ones you actually care about. And if you want to give them a little extra, don't just skip the ads, click on them. They have more money this way.
3. If you care about your small YouTubers, give them your money. To small YouTubers : I guess there are a couple of solutions for you. Start a Patreon and ask for your subscribers to give one dollar to every YouTuber they actually care about instead of giving it to YouTube Red, which will give more to the already big and basically nothing to the small. If I were in your shoes, I'd get OFF YOUTUBE and start going on other websites like Vimeo or Dailymotion.

Also, I'd start a little network for ALL small Youtubers to support each other, with categories (like gaming, humour, beauty & healthcare, and so on and so on), with a way to have your fans directly interact with you, and have a little « tip » if you like the video they made (10 cents, 25 cents, 50 cents, 1 dollar, 2 dollars) & also extras (up to 5 dollars a month) and in counterpart, the YouTuber could be giving some perks (like some merch, T-Shirts, posters, or follows on social media websites, I don't know), and for those who don't have money, some perks when you talk about your favourite small YouTubers on your social media websites or with your friends ! And also some forums for the fans to talk about their faves ALL THE TIME ! Come on, tell me your opinion about this. I'm a genius, aren't I ?

Anyways. YouTube Red is crap, giving more to the rich and ripping off the little hopes that current (or future) small YouTubers are having to see a little audience growing up and, even if they're not famous, to have a little group of people supporting them and giving them feedback.

I don't even have words for how sh*tty it is.

Okay, that's it for today ! I really hope you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Three Spooky Poems !!!

Three Spooky Poems !!!

Hi everybody, Mary here !

And HAPPY HALLOWEEN to you, cute ghosties, witches, vampires, and other magical creatures of the dark and spoopyness !

So, to celebrate Halloween, here are three spooky poems for you to enjoy ! Here they come !

The last two days

When you end up at the hospital,

For some paper formalities and an appointment for your mother,

You didn't expect, my dear,

To end up where you didn't want to stay.

The nurse takes your ID silently and gives you a room for two days.

You say, « But it's not for me ! I'm just here for five minutes !

Don't you understand what I'm trying to say ? »

You only see your name on the wall for the rooms,

« Fifth floor », she says in a monotonous voice.

You want to leave, your mother is still waiting

For you in the hallway of the building.

You leave.You ask your mother if you can drive the way home,

You say, « It will be faster this way. ». She refuses.

You go back home and wait.

The second day, a doctor comes to your house,

You tell him, « Are you here for my mother ? »

He says, « No, it's for you. That's why you have a room,

At the hospital. Let's go. »

And there you are. Fifth floor. You know your mother,

At home, is still agonising. The appointment you wanted,

For her, it was for her cancer. Too late.

Now you just have to wait until you are allowed

To express yourself. But no one comes for you,

No one listens, and you go to bed. You sleep,

Hoping that tomorrow, you'l be out of here.

But it's not the end ! When you wake up again,

Unsure of where you are, or what you've done,

You realise you are back at home with your dear mom.

You must have escaped, somehow, since you have

Dirt and blood on your hands.

So you go back to the hospital, since after all,

Your mother is still dying.

And so you go back to the hospital, give your ID,

The nurse says, « Fifth floor », and you realise,

That you are trapped inside this loop, the last two days

Of your life, that will never change. And once again,

You go to bed, and if you pay attention, you will hear

The doctor, silently, tell your mother,

« It's been two years since she goes back and forth

From the house to the hospital, and she hasn't realised

That her home, is on campus, my fellow doctor,

And that her mom never was sick. She's simply DEAD. »

405 words.

Sophie

Sometimes, in the middle of a conversation,

A name will pass by your mind, trying to tell you something ;

But you never understood quite what.

So you keep hearing these names, and even sometimes,

You catch yourself tellink those names

Out loud. Your friends have already started

To ask themselves, why you are doing this.

Once you've heard lots of names, going through

Your poor and desolated mind, you end up saying out loud

All the names that go through your name.

You find yourself interrupting your own sentences,

Or at times, other people, your own friends, parents, family,

And any other person of importance,

And they believe, that in the end, you are crazy.

Now it's not enough for you, my dear,

To say those names out loud. You need, to make them

Disappear, to shout them at the top of your lungs.

You still don't know what it means, but you end up

In a mental hospital, seeing the horrors

Doctors can do when they don't understand you.

After all, for your era, technology isn't advanced enough

To understand the words « mental illness ».

But one day, you find yourself, shouting only one name,

« SOPHIE ! », you yell, while banging at the door.

It isn't before the end of the day that a nurse passes by,

With your dinner, and tells you the news.

« Sophie, my dear, is dead. You best friend, the only one

You ever had, sadly passed away in a car crash. »

Now you understand what the names mean, and for once,

Your mind is silent again. You don't hear a name,

Until it speaks again.

Just to repeat your name, again and again. Now, it's your turn,

To join the souls trapped in this parallel dimension

That only you could hear from afar.

But this time, you are not afraid, you don't shout,

You just accept your fate, and you go away.

324 words.

Under your skin

Have you realised, darling, that ghosts

Are called spirits for a reason ?

Just like your spirit, they are unvisible forces,

Untangible, and yet, they can make you

Do things you thought you weren't capable of before.

Have you ever thought about

The shapes of the ghosts haunting your mind everyday ?

Do you think they have

The classic shape of a ghost ?

Or something more... original ?

Look under your skin, as you may or may not believe

The spirits going through your mind, they are

Cockroaches, really, crawling their way out

And if you don't find a way to let them out,

They will break the fragile shell

That is your skin, and destroy you.

You wanted to be a perfect human, and have

All the qualities ? You asked for your demons, or should I say,

your daimons, the spirits of the soul, the controllers of the mind,

The muses guiding you and telling you your strengths and your weaknesses

You should have asked for education and counseling, my dear,

Since you wanted to follow Faust's path, and you will pay the price.

And the cockroaches going through your skin will never leave you,

Not until you die. Or maybe,

Are you dead ALREADY ?

209 words.

Okay, that's it for today ! I really hope you enjoyed this little treat for Halloween and hope you'll be having a nice day/evening of spoopyness !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Fargo, S2 Ep3

Fargo, S2 Ep3

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, here's the reviewfor the third episode in the second season of Fargo ! Without any further ado, let's get started, shall we ?

The Myth Of Sisyphus

So, here are the three words I've chosen for today :

- Guns : Loads of guns in this episode, as the family with the company that I can't spell the name of is pretty armed and ready to defend their territory against "the Kansas City mafia", as the grandma says. Her father (father ??? to be proven) is still alive and seems to be quite in a better health than before, so it's a good sign. In the meantime, however, the grandma is a very strong woman and is ready to kick ass to save her company she's kept inside her family since the beginning of the century, even sometimes against her own sons. You go, grandma. You go. (But seriously though I'd arrest them for obstruction to justice... How do you do that in the USA in 1979, I don't know. Just DO IT Solverson ! Come on !)

- The Black Guy and His Two Friends Who Can't Speak : That could be the name of their boyband. I'd buy their music to be honest, if they weren't mafiosi with guns threatening and killing innocent people by pouring some boiling sh*t on their body after burying them alive. They should be arrested too ! Seriously, there are too many criminals in this town... But hey, seeing a black guy using two white ones as his pets in the 70s is not that common. (However, the remark : "Wow, it's not only for women anymore ?" about typewriters is definitely sexist. This men still have to learn something in their lives...)

- The Car Accident : So,to cover the car accident since Solverson (the wife) told her dad about her theory that is pretty much the truth (wow like you should be hired by the actual police you go girl you're probably more intelligent than anyone at the police station anyways but I guess women weren't that accepted in the police forces at the time or maybe she wouldn't like to be a cop anyways but I feel like she would love to be one actually), the couple decide to fake a car accident and try to get anway from it. But remember the brunette to whom the wife told everything about the car once it was already broken ? Well if she tells the truth to the police (which is probably going to happen), they'll be f*cked forever. We'll see when she speaks then...

Overall impression : Another thrilling episode fulled in guns, politics, influence and mafia ! Just Fargo the way I like it ! Can't wait for the next episode !

Okay, that's it for today, I really hope you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

YouTubers Are Bringing A Second Book ???

YouTubers Are Bringing A Second Book ???

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, a couple months ago, I wrote this series of three posts, right here, on my blog, about YouTubers writing books and having lots of opportunities, and actually, I ended up wondering if the so-called trend of YouTubers clogging the market with their books would actually see a proper end.

But no ! YouTubers don't have enough ! They are writing a second book ! (well, some of them...)

Now that I'm in a business school, I'm going to try to keep my composure and analyse this. I mean, I'm not against YouTubers writing books, an actually, I'm very proud of them for doing what they want to do, for letting their creativity flow and encouraging young people who wouldn't normally read that much buy an actual physical book and read it from the beginning to the end.

A little nugget of your favourite YouTuber that you can bring anywhere, even where're no Wi-Fi or electronic devices to watch their online content.

So I'm quite surprised, you know, when I find out that these idols revered by millions of young, vulnerable and very likely to do anything it takes to please their fave, are pulling out a second book.

Or maybe I shouldn't. After all, when they announced their first books (this is something I realised a lot when I watched these « big announcement !!!!!1!1!1!1!1 » videos), they were all like very happy and excited, omg I just invented the best thing since sliced bread, it made the whole process of actually writing look easy while it isn't really that easy because :

1. they were probably helped by editors/publishers since day one and also probably never had to face the creative block since it's their GODDAMN LIVES and they would be helped anyways
2. they recieved a book deal book that wasn't even finished smh waiting for the day when I can casually send 10k of my own work to a publishing house with the synopsis of my book and recieve the book deal the day after
3. they didn't have a lot of pressure to make it « good » since it's going to sell anyways
4. they didn't have to spend hours, days, weeks, months, YEARS trying to finish their book and selling it and being rejected every single time because « it won't sell » and cry EVERY NIGHT after they recieved another no in their e-mails
5. they're just excited because it's happening but they never felt the RELEASE actual writers have when their book is FINALLY published and accepted into the bookstores and yet still be SUPER-DUPER worried that it won't sell and thus publishers won't trust them with their next novel and refuse it because of « the lack of success in the previous one, because my dear we only take in things that SELL & GIVE US LOADS OF CASH $$$$$ »

NO NO NO NO NO. They don't know the actual pain of writing a fiction novel that will probably will get rejected because of its genre, length or targeted audience.

I've seen a forum about long novels being rejected, and someone saying that it's a trend from the last fifteen years. They ended up saying : « I feel like I'm trying to sell Beethoven's Fifth Symphony to a group of people who are awaiting for the next Shakira one-hit song. ». I guess it's the same for me. I'm still writing my book and I'm very pleased with it, but these words will stick in my mind, whenver I'll try to sell my work. (I have nothing against Shakira one-hit songs, by the way, I'm just quoting a sentence I've seen online, and I indulge myself in short, funny distractions all the time.)

What I'm trying to say here is, the concurrence was already pretty damn high before the YouTubers and their golden shoes decided to enter our space and sell their own books like little pieces of bread.

But now, they're making a second book ? As if the first one wasn't enough ? (I understand, when it's fiction, to do a sequel, because maybe the story wasn't ended, or maybe the writer wanted to add some more things, or when someone goes from non-fiction to fiction, because it's a whole different thing and I understand that.) I don't really get it.

Basically, certain YouTubers (the ones that said : « SECRET PROJECT !!!!! MUST NOT TALK ABOUT IT AT ALL !!!!! PENTAGONE-LIKE SECRETS AND YOU'LL SEE THAT QUITE SOON BUT I'M SO EXCITED TO TALK ABOUT THIS !!!!! SECRET THOUGH SO CAN'T TALK ABOUT IT BUT AAAAARGH WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT JUST BE EXCITED FOR ME AND GIVE ME ALL YOUR JEALOUSY AND YOUR NEED TO SEE IT I WANT YOU TO BE JEALOUS AND SUCH AND ASK ME CONSTANT QUESTIONS WHILE I'M JUST LIKE YEAH CAN'T TALK ABOUT IT SORRY »

and then : « THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD !!!!! VERY FUNNY AND ORIGINAL CONTENT !!!!! VERY CREATIVE !!!!! BY ME OMG THIS IS MY BABY MY ACTUAL CHILD YOU CAN HOLD IT IN YOUR HANDS ISN'T THAT MAGIC ????? I KEPT THIS SECRET FOR SO LONG YOU GUYS BUT THIS IS IT !!!!! I CAN FINALLY SHOW YOU !!!!! THIS IS WHY I WASN'T UPLOADING ON MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL THAT MUCH RECENTLY HAHAHA !!!!! JUST PRE-ORDER IT RIGHT NOW EVEN IF I HAVEN'T FINISHED WRITING IT SINCE I ALREADY HAVE THE BOOK DEAL BECAUSE I'M A YOUTUBER ANYWAYS!!! »

and finally : « OMG YOU GUYS I'M NUMBER ONE ON THE CHARTS HOW COOL IS THAT ????? SERIOUSLY DIDN'T EXPECT THIS AT ALL BECAUSE YOU KNOW I'M JUST A YOUTUBER WITH MILLIONS OF FANGIRLS WHO'D BUY ANYTHING FROM ME TO MAKE ME HAPPY !!!!! SERIOUSLY THANKS FOR READING MY BOOK MAKES ME SO HAPPY BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WOULDN'T WORK THAT WELL !!!!! SERIOUSLY BUY MY EXTRA-EXPENSIVE BOOK + SHIPPING TO WHATEVER COUNTRY YOU'RE IN WHILE I'M DOING A UK-EXCLUSIVE TOUR/COMPETITION BUT I PROMISE I'LL COME IN YOUR COUNTRY/WORLDWIDE SOON (only if you live in one of the following countries : the UK, the USA, Australia, maybe New-Zealand wtf is anyone there anyways hahaha ?) »)

are now like : « yeah I wrote another book AAAAARGH just buy it by preordering, the link is in the description ok thanks bye ».

(by the way : the paragraphs in all-caps is just an exaggeration/typical cliché/stereotype of the « shitty vlogger » and I am fully aware of the fact that not everyone is like this please don't kill me I'm just trying to tell you how I see/perceive YouTubers and their « book campaign » because honestly this is just TOO RIDICULOUS man since everyone did it at the same time while « believing » they were the only ones doing it hahaha they should know they aren't the only ones since they have the same management and they were probably the ones who got the contract with the publishers in the first place before the YouTubers signed it)

Like, maybe they were a little bit nervous when they wrote their first book and they didn't think about the fangirls' reaction, but seriously though they should have known that it would sell even if it was utter rubbish, and now that they see it's working, they just plan in another book in just a couple of months and they're just like : « Yeah, I wrote another book. Yeah, this is my life right now. See how easy it is to sh*t another book in a couple of months ? Anyways show me your purchase I'll follow you/send you a thanks message ok bye. »

Like I'm VERY happy to see self-made success that gives me hope that anyone with a talent can make in on their own, but just laying books like eggs isn't really doing a service to the publishing industry. It's more killing the talented, creative, original authors that are trying to do something valuable while hoping that it'll sell more than a thousand copies MAXIMUM.

I think that, as someone who wants to create her own publishing house one day, I'll take that into account. « Mary's Publishing House : For Every Long, Weird Or Rejected Book There Is A Book Deal Here. » Hahaha, it seriously should be my slogan from now on.

Anyways. You thought the YouTube book trend would end with all YouTubers having one book ? You were wrong. (And so was I, apparently, because I really hoped it would just be a trend, a fad that wouldn't last for long and that would just die out as fast as it appeared.) YouTubers won't stop there and they will keep going everywhere, on your TVs, radios, magasines, news websites, and so on, and so on, and so on...

(Now I'm making them look like people who want to dominate the world. I'm just trying to tell you that that's just the way it is, and that YouTubers are just the new generation of entertainers, online show hosts, and that they're basically the new celebrities going everywhere then can before the trend is over, I believe.)

Now, my last thought, to end on something positive for us fiction writers struggling with our always-rejected novels : is this going to be the fall of culture and civilisation like Freud predicted in his work from the early 20^th century ? I don't think so. I just believe that the power will be given to other hands, but that doesn't mean that lambda authors like you and me won't get published.

It's just like them being Hollywood while we're trying to sell indie art things. (Well, my publishing house should be about indie books ! Good idea ! Who's with me ?)

Okay, that's it for today, I really hope you enjoyed this (OMG VERY LONG) post, and I'll see you very soon with a new one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Jongens (Boys)

Jongens (Boys)

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, I just watched a very sweet gay love movie (in Dutch, with subtitles, please), and it's called Jongens (Boys). Since I really liked this movie, I told myself : "Hey, why not talk about this movie on my blog ?"

First of all, I should have told you that one of my distractions at the moment is to watch short gay love movies on YouTube ? And I was quite surprised to see a 7.6 (as of now) ranking on IMDB, so I decided to watch it, out of curiosity.

Man, I wasn't disappointed at all. So, this is a Dutch movie starring Sieg, a 15-year-old athlete working for a competition in a rally with three other boys. One of them is Marc and since they have loads of practice to do, they see each other a lot. Well, you guess what happens in this little groupe of friends : they go closer to each other, and such and such.

(I'm trying not to include spoiler here but that's going to be hard...)

Anyways, this is the discovery of Sieg's sexuality, the fact that he's not that comfortable with girls and that he prefers boys anyway... Loads of angst and sexual tension ensue, but at the very least (spoiler here) : the end is happy.

This won't be a long review, I just wanted to tell you that it's a very sweet movie, that isn't that long (78 minutes, so just a little bit more than an hour), and that I'd recommend to anyone tired of the cliché hetero couple in a little romance we see way too much.

This little story of denial, bargain, and final acceptance of Sieg's identity is something very beautiful, and seeing Marc (who's probably more experienced on the matter) trying to make Sieg understand that in the end, he should accept himself as who he is instead of  trying to hide the truth with that "girlfriend" Jessica, is something I definitely can understand.

Outside of this little cliché "I am not gay-WTF you have a girlfriend let's break up-But actually she isn't my girlfriend you're my only love-Oh yes let's reunite and love forever", the movie was very accurate, sweet and lovely, just like it should be.

I'd give it an 8/10 though, definitely recommend, whether you're in the LGBTQ+ community or not. It's very adorable and everyone should watch it.

Okay, that's it for today ! I really hope you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with a new one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Doctor Who, S9 Ep6

Doctor Who, S9 Ep6

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, today here's the review for the sixth episode in the ninth series of Doctor Who ! Without any further ado let's get started, shall we ?

The Woman Who Lived

So, here are the three words I've picked for this episode :

- Immortality : In this episode, we see Ashildr once again (yay me for finding her name !!!), as she spent the last 800 years living in her own with no company. When the Dotor asks her what she's done with the other chip that would grant immortality to someone, she said that no one was worth it. But I guess that in the end, she cared ad she saved this robber, and at the same time, the village that was about to get burned by aliens that used her to achieve their goals. And the most valuable lesson she's learnt in this episode is that even if humans have a very short lifespan, unlike her, they are valuable and should be protected at all costs.

- Escape : In the beginning of the episode, we see Ashildr wanting to fly away with the Doctor, to avoid seeing people die everyday. Well, actually, I don't think that it would improve her life pretty much since the Doctor still sees people dying everyday. But when she says she deserves more than that, and that her immortality is a curse that the Doctor has given to her, leading her life to be just an awful lot of running, hiding, changing your identity and being heartbroken by seeing your loved ones die, it's a little bit heartbreaking, too. Like in the end of The Girl Who Died, with the scene with all the passing days and night and her staying and seeing everyoe die around her.

- Second chance : I think that the real message here was in the title of the two episodes in this double-parter, The Girl Who Died and The Woman Who Lived. In the end, Ashildr was right : when she forgot who she was in the past and had to write her memories in a journal to get her life sorted, the girl she was in the Viking village died, in a way, with her loved ones she had to leave behind since everyone died, in the end. The thing she was the most afraid of losing her family and friend, ended up happening, and she had to bottle up her feelings to avoid being too emotionally invested in people who would abandon her, in the end. And in the end of the episode, when Clara shows the Doctor a selfie of her and one of her students who got an A thanks to his help, the Doctor sees Ashildr in the background. He doesn't tell Clara since she wasn't there, but now, the woman lives and enjoys her life and tries her best to care about people, even if they end up dying anyways.

Overall impression : Great episode, lots of very clever stuff about immortality and the human condition, and Clara saying "I'm not going anywhere" is ALREADY breaking my heart into pieces knowing she will end up leaving the TARDIS too.

Okay, that's it for today, I really hope you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

About Veganism, Three Months Later : The Checkpoint

About Veganism, Three Months Later : The Checkpoint

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, since today's the 25^th of October, it means that it's been three whole months since I decided to go vegan ! Yay me !!!

Anyways, I think it's time to have a first checkpoint and see how things have been since I decided to follow this lifestyle.

(By the way, I hate calling veganism a « diet », because 1) it's NOT a restriction to your alimentation, like when you want to lose weight so you CONCIOUSLY decide not to eat something you would normally eat in order to lose weight. I eat everything I want and I'm not here to lose weight, personnally, I'm fine with my weight, and 2) there's way more than what's in your plate that makes you vegan. It's a lifestyle against cruelty towards animals, not just a « fad » or a « trend », please, thank you for understanding.)

So, here's a list of things I've learnt since I went vegan :

I've been WAY more self-aware and concious about what I was eating and what is in my body. Since my body is not a graveyard but a temple (reminding me that my philosophy teacher at uni has written a book called Your Body Is A Temple, which made one of the girls chuckle for days on end because she was thinking about something else), I realised what I actually needed and being vegan cut loads of bad food compared to my omnivorous diet.

(I'm just saying here that I was horrible and always craving on meat, to the point when my step-dad told me « Well, when you move out, the only things you'll eat will be pasta, meat and chocolate ! », which was the final push to make me vegeterian one year before turning vegan. I've been wanting to do it for a long time, but I ended up doing it as a dare. And I haven't turned my back on things since. Now, I'm even sometimes picking up on my step-dad when he eats meat, like hey, meat-addict, you're eating meat AGAIN ??? but now, he's more concious about his diet too, so I guess it's a good point, in the end.)

I've been WAY more creative in the kitchen and tried to find new recipes around every week. I even own a side-blog for my vegan recipes that you can check out here : LINK, and even if I'm just a beginner cook, and my skills aren't that developed, I actually like cooking and trying new things to avoid the boring cliché of the student eating pasta and as steak, and occasionnaly the 'peas-and-carrots' jar with some fried fish or something like that. Even in my business school, many, if not everyone eats lunch at the cafeteria. They either buy these sandwiches that barely change from one day to the other, or the classic chips and meat (sometimes with a side of veggies) they serve everyday where they can buy a hot plate.

(Which leads me to this observation : people don't really understand why I'm bringing my food everyday, I've told some people about me being vegan and they usually ask the same questions ffs just educate yourselves pretty please, and when I tell them that I actually cook my own food every week, they look at me in the eye as if I were a genuine freak. I just told them that it takes just my Saturday morning to cook everything for the week and that I would be done. They still look at me as a freak and spend the next ten minutes telling me that they don't have the time to prepare anything, that most of their food is already prepared, or that they eat the same thing everyday, and they complain about how difficult it is to find new recipes, especially with veggies. I told this girl that she could do them with curry or some BBQ sauce and then she said « Wow, never thought of this ! Might as well try it someday ! ». Really, I'm just experimenting in the kitchen, that's all...)

Also, I've been eating WAY more veggies since I went vegan. As I said earlier, my diet was really not healthy before I went vegan, I would be craving for fat food and such. But now, I've been way healthier, and it makes me feel so much better, from the inside to the outside.

(I will end this point with a little advice for vegan-wannabees : please, please don't try to vegan right away. You can't do this overnight, because your body has been conditioned to a certain type of food, and changing it in the blink of an eye won't make you feel good at first. Cut the animal products one by one until you're vegan. Explain your family, friends and loved ones that you're changing your lifestyle, and ask for acceptance. It's usually the best way to go vegan and not end in the hospital because of this-or-that deficiency that hasn't been treated.)

So, yeah ! Lots of good stuff happening to me since I went vegan, and I hope, many more to come for the future !

Okay, that's it for today, I really hope that you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with a new one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Psychological Self-Harm

Psychological Self-Harm

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, today I'm not going to talk about something cute. It's something that has been going on since the beginning of this year, maybe last year, I don't even remember when it actually, properly started. And it's something that has affected my life in so many ways that you can't imagine.

(I'm ALL here for the people who are about to tell me : « But hey, it's not as bad as physical self-harm ! Stop complaining about your little sorry ass while I'm covered in scars ! You just want to have pity and compassion ! Sh*t the f*ck up no one wants to listen to you anyways ! », because it is as important as physical self-harm.)

I'm talking about psychological self-harm (as said in the title).

You know, about triggers that happen sometimes ? You see something, it reminds you of an unpleaseant fact about yourself or a memory from far away in the past coming up to haunt you and DESTROY you. Usually, there are trigger warnings to prevent you from bumping into those elements that could trigger anxiety, or even a panic attack. If you're a normally constitued human being, you try to run away from these triggers. You don't just go into them for fun.

But that's what I do, unfortunately. I don't avoid triggers, I purposedly go into them and I keep triggering myself. To me, it feels like stabbing my own mind.

I'm lonely and friendless ?

Why don't I go to these blogs talking about the AMAZING THINGS friendships can give you ! And be EXTREMELY JEALOUS AT THE SAME TIME WITH NO ADDITIONAL CHARGES ???

I'm afraid of dying lonely and not having the « one in a million » best friend/soulmate ?

Why don't I read posts about you should TELL THESE MOTHER-F*CKING LUCKY PEOPLE that you ENVY them, that EVERYONE IS LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THEIRS AND IT'S NOT HAPPENING AND PEOPLE SPEND THEIR ENTIRE LIVES LOOKING FOR THE PERFECT ONE AND NEVER FIND THEM ???

I'm pathetic, undeserving, unworthy of love, affection and friends ?

Why don't I reblog EVERYTHING related to depression quotes/loneliness quotes and act as GROSS and DISGUSTING on my own blogs and NEVER GET HEARD ANYWAYS BECAUSE NO ONE F*CKING CARES ???

And it's just like that everyday since. I'm just HORRIFIC and no one reads my stuff anyways. This is psychological self-harm. It's a nagging little creature in your head, your dark passenger, trying to tell you thousands of lies you end up believing because there's no one out there to tell you the truth.

That you're not alone.

That you've NEVER been and that you'll NEVER be.

That you ALWAYS have someone in your life, even if you think it's not the case.

That people support you. That people care about you. That people LOVE you.

It shouldn't matter if you don't have someone for now.

This state of mind won't last forever.

Sometimes, you need some little sentences like :

You WILL make it.

I'm SO proud of you for your accomplishments and I'm VERY supportive for things to come next.

You are PERFECT just the way you are.

You may not be flawless but no one is. Our flaws MAKE US perfect and unique.

Your current state is NOT your final one.

You MATTER. You BELONG here with everyone else. You belong as much as anyone else.

You are wanted and loved. Even if you don't believe it. There's ALWAYS someone thinking about you in a good way. Even if you did just a little thing for them.

You know, the other day, I asked myself this question about motivational speeches and sentences we needed to hear. Why is it so hard to give yourself the pep talk before crashing down in tears when someone else tells you the same speech ?

I think I finally found the answer. It may be a little bit negative, but here's my theory : when you're trying to give yourself the pep talk, the dark passenger is still in your head, trying to give you counter-arguments. It's like the fight between the angel and the demon sitting in your mind. In the end, the demon always win because of your mental illness. Mainly, people who have never experienced it can't really understand because their angel is the one winning all the time.

But when others are giving you the pep talk, they don't see the dark passenger. They only see the angel and not the demon. When they try to motivate you, they see the good and not the bad.

Why don't you try this yourself when you need to give yourself the pep talk ?

(Or at the very least try to diminish the impact of the demon to let the angel win...)

Okay, that's it for today ! I really hope you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

How To Keep A Faithful Audience : Fame, As Seen By A Businesswoman

How To Keep A Faithful Audience : Fame, As Seen By A Businesswoman

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, this isn't typically the kind of posts I upload, because this looks like sensationalist posts made by people who are just doing it for the fame. Because they know that's clickbait and they like it.

But since I'm in a business school now, and that I'm still very interested in that digital culture (social media websites, YouTube, and such), I was reading posts (my guilty pleasure, really)...

About how to become famous. That's it, really. (*whispering : I'm not here on this blog to become famous anyway, it was just to see how others percieve the path to fame, hahaha*)

Really, though. Not only these posts are way outdated (from YEARS ago), so the content in those posts isn't really... you know, helpful anyways. But also, I felt like these posts was way more about how to become mainstream than how to keep a faithful audience. Because, you know this, mainstream sells more than originality nowadays, don't you think ?

So, let's see the Internet (example : YouTube, but blogs work as well) as a market, right ? A big, big see where the fishes and the sharks fight to death. The biggest ones eat the little ones. The little ones, once eaten, disappear. Also, there's loads of food in the sea, you see where I'm getting. The MONEY. The screaming, agonising FANGIRLS trying to stalk you wherever you go. That rush of adrenaline when you go outside of your cosy little appartement just to do your groceries and when you know you will meet one of these people in the street.

Now, if you want to enter the sea, that's going to be a little bit complicated. But in one of my marketing lessons, I've learnt something about a market = YouTube and food = customers = fangirls that I probably will remember forever.

You have two ways of getting a faithful and regular audience online : either you go in the red sea. It's very big and menacing. That's where all the big sharks are. There's more food = fangirls, but you're more likely to be eaten up by the big numbers and swallowed whole, and disappear forever, lost in the crowd of people who wanted to go mainstream.

Or you go in the blue sea. It's much smaller and more peaceful. The sharks aren't there. But there's less food = fangirls. So you won't get as big as the big sharks in the red sea, because you don't have enough food. The big numbers won't swallow you whole because they don't f*cking care about you. You're doing a niche content that they aren't doing, so you're not a menace to them.

Now, choosing between wanting to go big and mainstream & taking all the risks & try to get bigger & fighting against big numbers vs wanting to do niche content but accepting the fact that you won't get as big & you won't have to fight much against the sharks because there isn't much concurrence on your market is all up to you. I'm not judging anyone here.

And there you have your explanation on a very big question that popped on my mind about YouTubers writing their own book ALL AT THE SAME TIME : because they are all big sharks in the red sea. If they don't follow, not only they are seen as outdated and unwilling to follow the trend. But also, they are afraid of seeing their food = fangirls going to be eaten by another shark.

(It's also why YouTubers that started in the red sea for the sake of getting noticed in the first place and were mainstream can't really do what they really want to do, or niche content : because they are TOO BIG to get into the blue sea. And if they tried, they would have to get much smaller & lose food = fangirls, which isn't really what they want to since they worked so hard to get big to become a shark in the first place. Also, that's why creative and original YouTubers that didn't go mainstream & did/are still doing niche content didn't really go big and are usually under a million, for the biggest of them.)

In the end : I'm not saying that fame is bad or anything. There's good and bad in every sea, blue or red. It's just that fame and recognition shoudn't be the reason to start a blog or a YouTube channel. Maybe, sometimes, you wanting to share things with people, even just a little, is a big enough reason to get started. So, why don't you do it ? After all, the two seas I've explained in this post are as interesting and as valid as the other one.... You just have to choose where you stand.

Okay, that's it for today ! I really hope that you enjoyed this little new post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

P.S. : For realsies though. I don't want to become famous AT ALL, but a little feedback about my blog and my posts would be VERY NICE and APPRECIATED. THANKS. <3

Stop Lying To Yourself (And To Others)

Stop Lying To Yourself (And To Others)

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, here's another problem I've recently found myself with : at the beginning of this year (January & February), I got a mental breakdown, because of numerous problems in my life (including depression, chronic insomnia, eating disorders, and such, soz). And in the end, I actually hadn't fully realised why...

Until my mom talked to me on the phone for an hour straight, during the winter holidays I had spent at the dorm instead of going back home, as I used to do every six to eight weeks.

My problem was, basically, that I was a compulsive liar. Not only I kept lying to others, but I also kept lying to myself, about who I was, who I wanted to become, what job I wanted in the future, about my career, my dreams, my hopes, my expectations, my wishes, my fears, my anxieties, and so on. I kept lying so much that I ended up believing my own lies.

And that's what had prevented me from being honest, not only to others but also to myself. When you're having problems in your life, that are indeed affecting it in the worst way possible, lying isn't a remedy. It just prevents yourself from getting help, the help you actually need in order to cope with your problems and just overcome them.

And at that point in my life, one of the critical periods of my life, my mom telling me I should be entirely and utterly honest, not only with her and myself, was actually the most helpful thing I've ever heard.

When I was with her on the phone, I made her a promise : that no matter what was happening in my life, good or bad, I would tell her. That I shouldn't be afraid, or ashamed of being sad, depressed, or in failure. That being stressed and/or nervous before exams or oral presentations was okay, in the end. And also, she told me that she hated the lies I had spent such a long time spreading around instead of telling the truth. (And I feel SO MUCH BETTER telling her the truth, because now, she can give me advice and tips on how to overcome the actual problems in my daily life !)

Now, I'm in a business school, very far away from home, living on my own. I'm very happy about how my life turned out to be, and I'm still looking forward to the future and how bright it looks. I know what I want to do now : I want to create my very own publishing house to help others develop their creativity and skills and, basically, be successful writers, thanks to me. Just thinking about it makes me very happy.

Maybe my life will change by the time I start working, but you know what ? It's time for me to move on. To take all the opportunities in front of me. And start being truthful to others, and to myself, because that's how, in the end, I'm making myself happy everyday.

And I'm telling the truth. Not only to others, but also to myself. You know, it's very therapeutic to analyse yourself and your feelings before making an irrational and/or an important decision.

What is the moral of this story, you may ask ? Well...

« Stop lying to yourself. And to others. Because when you're lying, not only you're hurting yourself, but you're also hurting others in the process. »

-theuncannymary, after crying like a baby because of a Robin Williams tribute video

Seriously though. You'll probably disappoint people in the process, because you're not that good at school, because you're having difficulties, because you're in trouble. Maybe, in the short term, it's not going to look that appetising. But in the long term, when you get the help you need, and get the comprehension from your friends, family and loved ones...

This will be your reward for being truthful and honest. To yourself and to others. Because you gotta admit it when you need help. This is always the first step to get the problems you're stuck with solved. FOR GOOD.

Okay, that's it for today ! I really hope that you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

P.S. : Now I HATE lies, white lies, big lies, and liars, those people who lie to either lie to themselves, or to others, in order to hide secrets or problems. The warning HAS BEEN SET.

Fargo, S2 Ep2

Fargo, S2 Ep2

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, here's the review for the second episode in the second season of Fargo ! Without any further ado, let's get started, shall we ?

Before The Law

So, here are the three words I've picked up for this episode !

- Lying : So, the couple who killed the killer and decided to hide it from everyone has decided to go back to work as normal and try to hide things from the world. The woman works in a hair salon and has lots of friends in front of whom she has to keep a front for them not to suspect anything... (Also who has that feeling or hope that the brunette friend is actually queer ? Like this little scene where she brushed the woman's shoulder... man that was so gay...) Anyway, how long will the couple hold on before they are discovered ? We'll see...

- Family : Man, that family, the Solverson, they are so cute together. The dad, grandfather, mom and daughter. Anyway, we can see that the mother is quite, you know, strong and all of that. On the other side, there's the family owning the company that these Kansas boys want to buy, and apprently, the oldest son is just a misogynistic asshole (pardon my French). Who said that a woman can't be Boss ? Since the mother is the closest related person to the founder, it's her turn to be boss. And I found her extremely indulgent since she'll leave the place to her son as soon as the crisis is over.

- Hiding : The investigation is still going strong, a gun has been found, and the husband is griding the corpse of the killer ??? Like, he could have burnt it or something. Is he going to transform it and sell it as meat ??? Like in Hannibal ? (Man I have too many cannibal thoughts in my head since I watched this TV show, even as a vegan...) Anyway, can't wait to see an innocent customer buying human meat and eat it while thinking it was some delicious pork. Argh, these butchers, you can't really trust them.

Overall impression : Anwesome episode, loads of family moments & gore, really impressive. Loads of suspense and I can't wait to see more !

Okay, that's it for today ! Anyways, I really hope you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Doctor Who, S9 Ep5

Doctor Who, S9 Ep5

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, here's the review for the fifth episode in the ninth series of Doctor Who. Without any further ado, let's get started, shall we ?

The Girl Who Died

So, here are the three words I've picked for this episode :

- Battlefield : In this episode, the Doctor and Clara find themselves with Vikings, to face some aliens who already killed their warriors. Now, only the farmers,fishmen, and basically anyone who never went on a battlefield have to fight aliens in armours. But as always, the Doctor has a plan, and he manages to save the village, even if he knows the consequence of the humiliation he has inflicted on "one of the deadliest species in the entire universe". Because he's the Doctor, he WINS. That's his job, after all, to have justice served, in the end. (Also, the recording and the threat to upload it on a universal "Internet-y" platform was very funny ! The aliens were shaking in fear for losing their reputation... Ah, modern technology & black-mailing. Very efficient.)

- Face : Also, we FINALLY have the explanation for Peter Capaldi being the Doctor despite the face that he was a Roman man in series four. (I had already understood from Deep Breath, the first episode in the eight series.) It's because he has to remind himself that, as the Doctor, he has to save people, he is afraid of losing people. So, he saves the storyteller, the little girl, because that's his duty to not let people down. (P.S. : The David Tennant cameo, from an older episode, as Ten, was marvellous, I shed a tear for it.) Because, in the end, he also cares a lot about Clara. I'm a little bit afraid of seeing his reaction when she leaves the TARDIS forever...

- Ripples & Tides : After all, this is one of the rare episodes when we see the Doctor talk about the rules of timetravelling, and the consequences of changing events from the past and the effects in the future. When he saves the young girl, basically, he only realises too late that he made her immortal. (And he remembers what he did because he met her in the future since she's still alive. As he says, it's like remembering things from his past, but that are in the future from a "linear point of view".) That's why even if he wins for now, the next episode is set a couple of centuries later, when the lady is still alive and the aliens will probably come back because of the humiliation they endured during the Viking era.

Overall impression : Excellent episode, had a little existential crisis when the Doctor talked about immortality, death being "an ability", and seeing everyone else die. Also because of that scene with all she sunrises and sunsets and probably the sorrow this girl has suffered when she lost her village to old age and probably had to leave it before people realise she's not aging anymore.

Okay, that's it for today ! Anyways, I really hope you liked this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Fargo, S2 Ep1

Fargo, S2 Ep1

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, here's the review for the first episode in the second season of Fargo ! I was actually SO excited for it to come that I LITERALLY squeeled in joy before watching the episode.

Anyways, here's the review. Let's go, shall we ?

Waiting For Dutch

So, here are the three words I've picked for this episode :

- Past : So, HERE'S the 1979 story Solverson (now I remember his name) was talking about during season 1, with all the dead people and shit. *well, then, it won't be a spoiler to you, if you've watched season 1, that the wife will die and Molly, the little girl, will only have her father for the rest of her life, and that Solverson, the father, will be injured and retire early from the police* *sorry if you didn't remember and consider this as a spoiler* *didn't mean it sorry* THAT will be interesting. AND there is KIRSTEN MOTHERF*CKING DUNST so what could be better than THAT ???

- Lots of murders : Once again, "true story", "the living's names have been changed", and "to respect the dead, however, we'll tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth". And a cray guy that shot a lot of people and then was killed by the blonde woman played by Dunst. *I may call her Dunst now because I don't even remember if her name was said in the episode or not* Anyway, some more mayhem, Fargo style : like old times. *realises pun because this story is in the past and the previous one is in the future relatively to this time and yet I'm talking about season 1 like old times. Also I watched the first season, like... two or three months ago, so that's not really old times.*

- Badass women : Let's just stop for a second for this short-haired lawyer (or something important like that) woman right before she was killed in a café where the specialty is waffles. And appreciate "vintage women" (this is in 1979, so even if this has been filmed quite recently, this is cool) being BADASS AS F*CK. Also let's booh at those men being all about their stereotyping and treating women as inferior. If you wanted accuracy, well, you got it, Fargo. But maybe it was a little exaggerated. Am I right ?

Overall impression : AWESOME premiere, ending with the story that will follow up : Dunst & Husband trying to hide the crazy guy's body (like Lester in season 1 tried to hide his wife's murder for the whole season), some guys from Fargo wanting to buy a company owned by the family of the dead crazy guy, and some illegal sh*t thrown everywhere. Mayhem, Fargo style. I. LOVE. IT.

Anyways, that's it for today ! I really hope that you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our lasr word : KIDNEYS !

Doctor Who, S9 Ep4

Doctor Who, S9 Ep4

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, here's the review for the fourth episode in the ninth series of Doctor Who. Without any further ado, let's get started, shall we ?

Before The Flood

So, here are the three words I've picked for this episode :

- Bootstrap paradox : In this episode, when the Doctor learns that he's already dead (and his ghost is wandering around the base), he decides to go back in time to alter his timeline and save himself from dying, to save Clara. He's determined to change the events and in an attempt to do so, But what he doesn't know (yet) is that he's created a bootstrap paradox : it's an endless loop of the Doctor realising the ghost with the message, then he goes back in time to alter the message, to see the message again, to deliver the message, to alter it again, and so on. Like Beethoven : who had the idea to compose the fifth symphony ? Because the Doctor had the sheets, but realised Beethoven didn't exist, so he replasec him, and then, he created the symphony by replacing Beethoven, so in the future he can appreciate the music, and go back again and re-do Beethoven. But really, when and how did he have these ideas in the first place ? We will never know.

- Cheating : Also in the episode, features a Death-like creature that likes cheating about life and death. And since it's cheating, the Doctor decides to... well, cheat as well. Like, he kept saying thzt he can't change the timeline in the beginning of the episode, but in the end, he does it anyway, to save Clara, and he explains that the names after the last lady who died were "random" so that the messages still scares the Doctor when he's alive to give him the final push to change the future. So, really, he had been planning this cheating all along, since it's the paradox that saved his life and Clara's and all the others' life, in the end.

- Saving Clara : Last but not least, I really liked the speech given by this man (sorry, don't remember the name) saying that the Doctor didn't care about others dying to "prove his therory", but that when it comes to Clara, he would do anything to save her life (like in the two first episodes of this series, am I right ?). And when I think about it, I'm thinking : but what will actually happen when she leaves the TARDIS (since Jenna Coleman has said she's left the place already) ? And who will replace someone as important for the Doctor as Clara ? We'll see...

Overall impression : Quite an emotional episode, Cass smooching her translator and them being happy and in love vs the guy who lost his chance to confess his love to this girl is quite heart-breaking. Anyways, great episode.

Anyways, that's it for today ! I really hope that you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

Childhood Story #5

Childhood Story #5

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, here's to another Childhood Story ! That time when I remember memories from a distant past and decide to put it here for everybody to see !

So let's get started, shall we ?

That Time When I Stopped A Rollercoaster

So, I was four or five years old. Near my house, there's a stadium, and every year, there's this fair that happens in the end of June that's quite funny since I lived in a very small village (well, by small I mean between 10,000 and 15,000 people). I mean, it's a little distraction from the typical boring lifestyle I was used to. (Living near a retirement house doesn't help. Poor souls trapped there, waiting for death to come. They could do something fun but no one seems to care.)

Anyways, my mom decided to make me go with my step-dad. We went on that little rollercoaster that wasn't even that high, and it was even so small that they would make us do three laps for one setting.

But I really, really didn't like it.

After only one turn, I started to get sick and panicky, up to the point that the guy operating down there had... well, to stop the thing to let me go out before he would start again and do the two remaining laps for the people who were on the ride with us.

We went back home. I was released to not me in this nightmare anymore, but the way my mom looked at me in utter disapproval for the rest of the night before we went to bed was also very scary.

Since, my mom has been so reluctant to let me on a rollercoaster. I mean, even now, to get me on one, you have to be very convincing. It's not like I'm one of those freaks that hates fun and getting scared or anything. But I guess it's just like horror movies : getting scared just for the sake of getting scared isn't really my cup of tea.

Related stories that I think you'll like :

When I was eight or nine, we went to another park (with some other kids, not my family) and me & a bunch of other girls also stopped a rollercoaster after only one turn out of three. Man, the monitor getting there with is wasn't pleased at all.

A couple of years after the first incident (by that I mean more like ten years, when I was 15), while in holidays in Canada, we went in this park in Montréal and there was a gigantic wood rollercoaster with a "soft" mode and a "hard" mode. My little brother & step-dad did both, my mom & me did just the soft one. Even with that, I got more scared than my mom (which is unusual since she's very jumpy) and I couldn't breathe. My whole family called me a "sissy" and mocked me, but I was dead serious. I couldn't breathe.

Anyways, that's it for today, I really hope that you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !

The Uncanny Fail #5

The Uncanny Fail #5

Hi everybody, Mary here.

So, today, I'm here to talk about another fail of mine ! Yay for originality !

Anyways, I just wanted to tell you my experience... of being left-handed. So here we go !

The Left-Handed Life

(Or : how the fact that you have a different dominant hand and being in that minority will F*CK YOU UP for LIFE.)

So, a couple of facts about left-handed problems that actually exist and are considered as discrimination :

- Being left-handed was considered, for a very long time, to be "friends with the devil". In schools, left-handed people were forced to act like their right-handed peers to conform to the society's norms, that dictated that being left-handed was called "rebellion", "non-conforming", basically, evil.

- I don't know about you, but let's look at the words left and right for a second. Left is also the past tense of the verb to leave. Basically, left-handers were left out, while being right-handed was considered... to be right. In French, we have gauche and droite. The French expression "être gauche" means "to be a little clumsy". Droit/droite is also an adjective to say "straight" (like a straight line). In Italian, we have sinistra and destra, derivated from the Latin dexter (which means right), and sinistra, which means sinister. No wonder why left-handers were considered to be friends with the devil himself.

- Only 10 % of the population is left-handed. We are literally derivating from the norm.

- Objects/products marketed towards left-handers are usually more expansive than the EXACT SAME PRODUCTS made for right-handers. Economic stuff, quite basic, because less people buying = individual costs more expansive = higher prices.

Now, my personal fails, so you can swallow that pill better !

- GODDAMN SCISSORS COME AT ME & I'LL FIGHT YOU (seriously though, now I cut everything with my right hand, since I've been CONDITIONED to do so).

- THIS COOKING THINGY WOULD WORK IF IT WERE IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION (but no this is made for right-handers hahaha).

- OH GOD I BURNED MYSELF WITH THE IRON AGAIN WTF (because it was on the wrong side for me as a left-handed person).

- HOW DO YOU FOLLOW A TUTORIAL ON YOUTUBE/FOLLOW THE ADVICE OF A FRIEND TO DO YOUR HAIR/MAKE-UP WHEN THEY'RE LITERALLY ALL RIGHTIES AND YOU'RE A LEFTY THOUGH ??? (really it's been bugging me a lot so if any lefty wants to show me how to do stuff it'll help thanks).

- HOW DO YOU PLAY ON CONSOLES AS A LEFTY THOUGH ??? (like how do you use the pad on a tactile screen/use the controllers made for righties when there's no mode ever for lefties ???).

Anyways, that's it for today ! I really hope that you enjoyed this post and I'll see you very soon with another one !

And as usual, our last word : KIDNEYS !